Go See Love, Simon This Effing Instant

It exceeded every single one of my already HIGH expectations, but that is no surprise right?

I cried seven times in the movie theatre, if that doesn’t say something about how much you should see this movie, I don’t know what will.

Anyways, I’ve been wanting to see this movie ever since I started reading Simon V. The Homosapiens Agenda, and I knew how much of an impactful movie this was going to be. Something you may not know about me s that when i grow up, I would like to be in the film industry and write movies. But I want to write movies that make an impact. And Love, Simon is the perfect example of those types of movies. The film industry needs a wakeup call in what they precedent as ‘normal’ or ‘Oscar-worthy’ 

Diversity in both books and movies is something that I feel so strongly about. Because I read and watch almost everything diverse but it is just not enough. I started writing my book because I read Carry On and then I stopped writing it because I was growing busy. Then I decided to read more like Ramona Blue or Simon or More Happy Than Not and after reading those amazing wonderful novels, my need to write just grew. And it is safe to say, that after watching Love, Simon, I needed to keep writing. Because there is a reason why I write.

I write because I see how much these books impact the lives of people. Even in the smallest way possible. And if I can do something for this world it is to make one child, teen, or adult, happy because of my writing. 

Now I could go on and on about this topic, but this post is a shrine to Love, Simon. These actors embraced these characters so much that I know that they are the characters. The plot is so beautiful and heart-hitting that even the pickiest of book-to-movie adaptation critics will see how distinguished this movie. Yes, the movie and the plot of the movie isn’t exactly like the book. But I don’t care. I really don’t. And as someone who considers to be a huge book-to-movie critic, this is a huge achievement on the part of the movie. 

I don’t know what else to say other than the adjectives I would use to describe this movie. So that’s what I’ll do.

astonishing, astounding, surprising, stunning, staggering, shocking, startling, stupefying, breathtaking; awesome, awe-inspiring, sensational, remarkable, spectacular, stupendous, phenomenal, extraordinary, incredible, unbelievable, mind-blowing, jaw-dropping; literary wondrous, amazing.

oh and…

Made You Up by Francesca Zappia

Made You Up by Francesca ZappiaMade You Up by Francesca Zappia
Published by Greenwillow Books on May 19th 2015
Genres: Contemporary, Young Adult
Pages: 428
Format: Epub
Source: Purchased

Reality, it turns out, is often not what you perceive it to be—sometimes, there really is someone out to get you. Made You Up tells the story of Alex, a high school senior unable to tell the difference between real life and delusion. This is a compelling and provoking literary debut that will appeal to fans of Wes Anderson, Silver Linings Playbook and Liar.

Alex fights a daily battle to figure out the difference between reality and delusion. Armed with a take-no-prisoners attitude, her camera, a Magic 8-Ball, and her only ally (her little sister), Alex wages a war against her schizophrenia, determined to stay sane long enough to get into college. She’s pretty optimistic about her chances until classes begin, and she runs into Miles. Didn't she imagine him? Before she knows it, Alex is making friends, going to parties, falling in love, and experiencing all the usual rites of passage for teenagers. But Alex is used to being crazy. She’s not prepared for normal.

Funny, provoking, and ultimately moving, this debut novel featuring the quintessential unreliable narrator will have readers turning the pages and trying to figure out what is real and what is made up.

If I could give this book ten hearts, I would. Guys, I don’t think you comprehend how much I loved this book. I read this book at around 10 P.M last night, and finished it around 12:30 A.M with such a face of shock. Francesca Zappia has surprised me once again. If you remember, last year, I said that Eliza and Her Monsters (Francesca’s other novel) was probably my favorite book of 2017 and I still stick by to that opinion. Not to dive in too deeply, but when I write I never write anything personal. I’ve only written one personal thing in my entire life and that was a letter to Francesca just so you have an idea of how her writing had impacted me. You would think that after I read Eliza and Her Monsters, I would immediately purchase her other book. But here’s the thing, I never knew she had another book. And when I did find out, I forgot. It wasn’t until a week or two again when I was looking at Eliza and Her Monsters that I remembered Made You Up and I am so thankful that I did. No doubt in my mind that Made You Up is my favorite book of 2018 so far (and of all time), and Francesca definitely has made her way to my favorite authors list as well. 

Now I was going to make this review spoiler-free like I do with all my other posts but I just can’t. I’ll warn the people who haven’t read Made You Up yet when you should stop reading this post, but for now you are safe. 

Alex is one of the main reasons I loved this book so much. I don’t know how Francesca does it, but her characters impact me so much more than any other characters I have read about. Alex is a teenager girl going to a new school in her senior year and she has schizophrenia. Now before reading this book, I didn’t know much about schizophrenia, borderline nothing. But even a person who knows nothing can tell how much Francesca worked and researched schizophrenia to make it real. And she did. She made it so incredibly real. Alex is such a lovable characters. In fact, almost all the characters are lovable. Miles is a real guy. He doesn’t seem fictional to me. He seems like somebody I can actually meet and fall in love with, which is something that is very rare in YA novels.  

This book isn’t only a contemporary novel though, it also has some horror and mystery lacing it. Not entirely, but there are definitely factors of it throughout the book. And just like Eliza and Her Monsters, Francesca’s writing stile is so insanely beautiful. I’ve taken a few moments here and there to reflect on the words she wrote. Now, I spent practically the whole night thinking about the book and I don’t know what else to say without spoiling it for all of you who haven’t read it yet. So if you haven’t read it, I suggest you stop reading this post now. Like now. And then after you’re done, you can come back and read the rest. Bye bye.

Okay, let us commence with Alex and her photography. The second that camera was shown, I was immediately distrustful of the parents. Just like Miles said, why in the living hell can’t they tell her what is real and what isn’t. Isn’t that what a parent should do? Charlie, for instance. That scene broke my heart over and over again. Finding out that Charlie wasn’t real and that she died when she was just four years old was a stab in the gut to me, because just like Alex, I thought she was real, she felt so real. And then there is the Eight Ball and all the other stuff, I just felt for her. Not in a pitying sort of way, I hate it when people pity me. Of course, I don’t fully understand what was inside her head and what she was feeling but it just felt like I understood her enough to be friends with her and talk to her. The whole mystery with Scarlet creeped me out to my inner core, it was insane. Much like I did with Eliza. 

The principal, that disgusting sleezebag. I’m glad that the book wasn’t only about Alex’s schizophrenia and there was that added mystery to it. It was also insanely funny. These characters are so humorous, I can’t count how many times they made me laugh.

You know what I loved? The game that that the club made with Miles. It was those little moments between all the characters that really made me fall in love with the characters. I had no idea who the hell these historical figures were though. I loved when Alex kissed Miles for the first time. And her telling him that she knew he was Blue Eyes. And when they visited his Mom. I loved it all. 

Testing The Book Blogger *smirk emoji*

Hello fellow booknerdigans,

Today I’ve decided to a book tag or several in this case. I know. I haven’t done those in centuries. But I haven’t been reading lately because of work and school (I know, shameful) and I still want to post something without it being some sort of book review. Which I promise I’ll do soon! I literally just finished a fantasticalulous book. And I honestly think this is going to be pretty fun. WARNING! I’m experimenting with not capitalizing a lot of things bc I rlly want to put more pressure on my anxiety 🙂  Trust me, I REALLY don’t want to disobey the rules of grammar.

what are your top three book pet hates?

well obviously my number one is instalove. doesn’t everyone have that as their number one? i just don’t find it very believable and yes i know that i read fantasy and paranormal, and that thing that i don’t find believe is instalove. i’m insane. 

SHITTY BOOK COVERS ON AMAZING BOOKS! yes, i’m looking at you Obsidian. ESPECIALLY when it comes to NA books! they always look like cheesy romance novels and even though that is exactly what they are, they have so much more depth to them than the romance. 

books with no epilogue…especially if it is a contemporary novel. if you are a contemporary novel and you don’t have an epilogue, let’s just say you’re already down one heart. how will I know if my babies are doing okay? if they live happily ever after? i’m looking at you Eleanor and Park.


describe your perfect reading spot.

firstly, it’ll be raining. no thunderstorms or lightning, just calm rain for hours on end. i’m sorry familia but the house would be empty and I would be laying down on the sofa, wearing my favorite pajamas and M&M blanket.


tell us three book confessions.

i severely break that ‘don’t judge a book by it’s cover rule. i break it every time i go shopping for books. oooh, shiny. ooh, pretty. and then there is the fact that it takes me centuries to read a book that i own but has a ugly cover. look at Obsidian. my favorite book. took me six months to read it after i accidentally bought it.

never fully read the Harry Potter series nor the Twilight quartet. no particular reason except I wasn’t a huge book person at the time of those two.

as you probably all know, i am a cliche bad boy/good girl/mates ADDICT! i don’t know what it is about these books that capture me like a donut on a stick. EVEN IF THEY ARE TERRIBLE i will still end up trying to finish it because i’m a sucker like that


when was the last time you cried while reading?

Second Chance Summer by Morgan Matson. i read it in late 2017 and i couldn’t stop bawling over this book. i’m like 90% sure i made a review talking about the torture (in a good way) this book put me through.


how many books are on your bedside table?

12. Don’t judge.


what is your favorite snack whilst reading?

fun fact, i don’t actually eat whilst i’m reading. i get distracted way too easily, so i can only do one thing at a time. BUT if i end up bringing my book to a place of eating (which i sometimes do) i’ll most likely be drinking some sort of tea, juice, or in some rare cases; pineapple.


if you had to ‘delete’ a book from the world, which would that be?

i have a strong vendetta against Peace, Love, and Baby Ducks.


can you just stop reading or do you have to stop after a chapter/a certain amount of pages?

HAH! you’re hilarious if you think i can’t stop reading once i get into a book.

Do you write in your books?

okay LISTEN my opinion on this matter changes from time to time. i absolutely hate any type of writing on my books but i want to save my favorite quotes, right? RIGHT?!?!?!?! so i have a rule with myself that if i reread a book for the third time, then i’m allowed to write in it. my friend Sabrina once drew something on my copy of Carry On and i was so furious with her cause i only reread it twice. 


BACK TO CORRECT GRAMMAR! Anyways, guys! I have exciting news! I AM OFFICIALLY an assistant editor at Teen Sequins, an amazing literary arts journal! And we have open our submissions for teens! I really recommend you guys send out your stuff if you’re an aspiring writer 🙂


Firstlife by Gena Showalter

Firstlife by Gena ShowalterFirstlife (Everlife, #1) by Gena Showalter
Published by Harlequin Teen on February 23rd 2016
Genres: Dystopian, Young Adult, Romance
Pages: 467
Format: Hardcover
Source: Library

Step one...you die.


Tenley "Ten" Lockwood is an average seventeen-year-old girl…who has spent the past thirteen months locked inside the Prynne Asylum. The reason? Not her obsession with numbers, but her refusal to let her parents choose where she’ll live — after she dies. There is an eternal truth most of the world has come to accept: Firstlife is merely a dress rehearsal, and real life begins after death.

In the Everlife, two realms are in power: Troika and Myriad, long-time enemies and deadly rivals. Both will do anything to recruit Ten, including sending their top Laborers to lure her to their side. Soon, Ten finds herself on the run, caught in a wild tug-of-war between the two realms that will do anything to win the right to her soul. Who can she trust? And what if the realm she's drawn to isn't where the boy she's falling for lives? She just has to stay alive long enough to make a decision…

To say that this book was so utterly, completely, irrevocably disappointing is the understatement of the year, and it is only January. Imagine me, Gabi, walking into her local library with a shining smile on her face, excited to pick up her next read. Scrolling through the short bookshelves and scouting for the book or books I was going to take home with me. See me look at the cover of this gorgeous book called Firstlife and immediately opening it up to see the summary, seeing how it looked freaking awesome, I trotted back down to humble abode and started reading. 

Cut to several hours later as I with angsty heated tears in my eyes throws the book across the room where my throw pillows were. Glaring at it with all my might. Wondering how in the hell could I have been so disappointed. You do not understand how hard it was for me to continue reading that book and finishing it. But one of my “New Years Resolutions” was to try and not DNF a book, no matter how terribly bad it is. Just because I want to start making more reviews, and books I dislike give me ample ideas to write them.

Why do you dislike this book Gabi if I may ask? 

There’s a lot of reason but I am going to start with what I hated hated most about it. Now, Gena Showalter is not a bad writer whatsoever. Hell, she published a freaking series before this one. BUT the way she writes teenage dialogue makes me cringe like never before.

“Duuuuude. A heads-up would’ve been nice. Can you say whack shack?”

That’s the first sentence in this book. If she is trying to appeal to this generation of teenagers, I think she could’ve dialed it down just a tad. And its not only that, here are a few more examples.

“But her general nastiness triggered my inner bitch. I didn’t even know I had an inner bitch!”
― Gena Showalter, Firstlife

“Stop trusting your eyes and start listening to your heart. It sees more than you ever will.”
― Gena Showalter, Firstlife

“Feelings are fleeting, no matter how earth-shattering they seem; they never last, always change.”
― Gena Showalter, Firstlife

“The outside is a shell for all of us. My beauty is on the inside, where it never fades.”
― Gena Showalter, Firstlife

Serious question. Are these direct quotes from an angsty PG-13 version of Barbie’s Life in the Dream House? Teenagers come in different shapes and sizes but they all come with different words and phrases set to default in their head, and I never met one person who would ever utter these words out of their mouths. You can badly tell that an adult wrote this. 

Now the characters. I feel like they were straight out of a trope filled wheel of fortune. We have your “special girl” or the “chosen one” of sorts. *eye roll* I don’t even want to talk about Ten. She just makes me want to sigh for the rest of my life. The words she chooses to speak out of her mouth are quite cringe. Especially when she says she doesn’t care about outside beauty and then proceeds to call Killian “so hot” every freaking two pages. Which leads me to my next point. We have the “forbidden apple” bad boy who the main characters tries to stay away from but apparently can’t be repelled from his “immense beauty” and finally we have the quirky best friend that will complete the love triangle. Now let’s just say that I liked ONE character in this book and that was the quirky best friend. HE WAS HELPFUL, NICE, THE ONLY FUNNY ONE AND GUESS WHAT?! WE BARELY SEE HIM! Well we see him less than the other two. 

Now the whole plot. It was basically the reason I was so excited to read this book. Did you read the description? It sounded freaking awesome! But all it did was confuse me. I wasn’t too sure how to differentiate Troika from Myriad. Nor, did I see the reason why Ten had such difficult choosing one or the other. It honestly bothered me how she didn’t end up choosing one of them until probably the last chapter of the book. I don’t even know if I would want to be in either one of these afterworlds. It’s like those Buzzfeed introvert/extrovert quizzes! Where they ask if you rather stay at home alone with sad music or be doing drugs outside fo your house with the cast of Victorious. 

Okay, I’m done. This was fun. I honestly love doing these types of reviews but I also don’t dislike books very often (thankfully I usually check Goodreads before picking one up)






DON’T KILL ME, I’M SORRY! FAVORITE READS OF 2017Carry On by Rainbow Rowell
Published by St. Martin's Griffin on May 9th 2017
Genres: Fantasy, Young Adult, LGBTQ+
Pages: 528
Format: Hardcover
Source: Purchased

A #1 New York Times-bestseller

Simon Snow is the worst Chosen One who's ever been chosen.

That's what his roommate, Baz, says. And Baz might be evil and a vampire and a complete git, but he's probably right.

Half the time, Simon can't even make his wand work, and the other half, he starts something on fire. His mentor's avoiding him, his girlfriend broke up with him, and there's a magic-eating monster running around, wearing Simon's face. Baz would be having a field day with all this, if he were here — it's their last year at the Watford School of Magicks, and Simon's infuriating nemesis didn't even bother to show up.

Carry On - The Rise and Fall of Simon Snow is a ghost story, a love story and a mystery. It has just as much kissing and talking as you'd expect from a Rainbow Rowell story - but far, far more monsters.

C’mon. I’m not going to even try to explain to you why this book is in my favorites. It literally inspired my WIP.

DON’T KILL ME, I’M SORRY! FAVORITE READS OF 2017Lord of Shadows (The Dark Artifices, #2) by Cassandra Clare
Published by Margaret K. McElderry Books on May 23rd 2017
Genres: Fantasy, Young Adult, LGBTQ+
Pages: 701
Format: Hardcover
Source: Purchased

Would you trade your soul mate for your soul?

A Shadowhunter’s life is bound by duty. Constrained by honor. The word of a Shadowhunter is a solemn pledge, and no vow is more sacred than the vow that binds parabatai, warrior partners—sworn to fight together, die together, but never to fall in love.

Emma Carstairs has learned that the love she shares with her parabatai, Julian Blackthorn, isn’t just forbidden—it could destroy them both. She knows she should run from Julian. But how can she when the Blackthorns are threatened by enemies on all sides?

Their only hope is the Black Volume of the Dead, a spell book of terrible power. Everyone wants it. Only the Blackthorns can find it. Spurred on by a dark bargain with the Seelie Queen, Emma; her best friend, Cristina; and Mark and Julian Blackthorn journey into the Courts of Faerie, where glittering revels hide bloody danger and no promise can be trusted. Meanwhile, rising tension between Shadowhunters and Downworlders has produced the Cohort, an extremist group of Shadowhunters dedicated to registering Downworlders and “unsuitable” Nephilim. They’ll do anything in their power to expose Julian’s secrets and take the Los Angeles Institute for their own.

When Downworlders turn against the Clave, a new threat rises in the form of the Lord of Shadows—the Unseelie King, who sends his greatest warriors to slaughter those with Blackthorn blood and seize the Black Volume. As dangers close in, Julian devises a risky scheme that depends on the cooperation of an unpredictable enemy. But success may come with a price he and Emma cannot even imagine, one that will bring with it a reckoning of blood that could have repercussions for everyone and everything they hold dear.

The most surprising favorite of 2017! So freaking excited for Queen of Air and Darkness!

DON’T KILL ME, I’M SORRY! FAVORITE READS OF 2017Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda by Becky Albertalli
Published by Balzer + Bray on April 7th 2015
Genres: Contemporary, Young Adult, LGBTQ+
Pages: 303
Format: Hardcover
Source: Purchased

Sixteen-year-old and not-so-openly gay Simon Spier prefers to save his drama for the school musical. But when an email falls into the wrong hands, his secret is at risk of being thrust into the spotlight. Now Simon is actually being blackmailed: if he doesn’t play wingman for class clown Martin, his sexual identity will become everyone’s business. Worse, the privacy of Blue, the pen name of the boy he’s been emailing, will be compromised.

With some messy dynamics emerging in his once tight-knit group of friends, and his email correspondence with Blue growing more flirtatious every day, Simon’s junior year has suddenly gotten all kinds of complicated. Now, change-averse Simon has to find a way to step out of his comfort zone before he’s pushed out—without alienating his friends, compromising himself, or fumbling a shot at happiness with the most confusing, adorable guy he’s never met.

Again. C’mon.

DON’T KILL ME, I’M SORRY! FAVORITE READS OF 2017I'll Give You the Sun by Jandy Nelson
Published by Dial Books on September 16th 2014
Genres: Contemporary, Young Adult, LGBTQ+
Pages: 384
Format: Hardcover
Source: Purchased

“We were all heading for each other on a collision course, no matter what. Maybe some people are just meant to be in the same story.”

At first, Jude and her twin brother Noah, are inseparable. Noah draws constantly and is falling in love with the charismatic boy next door, while daredevil Jude wears red-red lipstick, cliff-dives, and does all the talking for both of them.

Years later, they are barely speaking. Something has happened to change the twins in different yet equally devastating ways . . . but then Jude meets an intriguing, irresistible boy and a mysterious new mentor.

The early years are Noah’s to tell; the later years are Jude’s. But they each have only half the story, and if they can only find their way back to one another, they’ll have a chance to remake their world.

This radiant, award-winning novel from the acclaimed author of The Sky Is Everywhere will leave you breathless and teary and laughing—often all at once.

Printz Award Winner Stonewall Honor Book

I cried. That says enough.

DON’T KILL ME, I’M SORRY! FAVORITE READS OF 2017The Epic Crush of Genie Lo by F.C. Yee
Published by Amulet Books on August 8th 2017
Genres: Paranormal, Young Adult
Pages: 336
Format: Hardcover
Source: Purchased

She annihilates standardized tests and the bad guys.

Genie Lo is one among droves of Ivy-hopeful overachievers in her sleepy Bay Area suburb. You know, the type who wins. When she’s not crushing it at volleyball or hitting the books, Genie is typically working on how to crack the elusive Harvard entry code.

But when her hometown comes under siege from hellspawn straight out of Chinese folklore, her priorities are dramatically rearranged. Enter Quentin Sun, a mysterious new kid in class who becomes Genie’s self-appointed guide to battling demons. While Genie knows Quentin only as an attractive transfer student with an oddly formal command of the English language, in another reality he is Sun Wukong, the mythological Monkey King incarnate—right down to the furry tale and penchant for peaches.

Suddenly, acing the SATs is the least of Genie’s worries. The fates of her friends, family, and the entire Bay Area all depend on her summoning an inner power that Quentin assures her is strong enough to level the very gates of Heaven. But every second Genie spends tapping into the secret of her true nature is a second in which the lives of her loved ones hang in the balance.


DON’T KILL ME, I’M SORRY! FAVORITE READS OF 2017A Court of Wings and Ruin (A Court of Thorns and Roses, #3) by Sarah J. Maas
Published by Bloomsbury Childrens Books on May 2nd 2017
Genres: Fantasy, Young Adult
Pages: 699
Format: Hardcover
Source: Purchased

Looming war threatens all Feyre holds dear in the third volume of the #1 New York Times bestselling A Court of Thorns and Roses series.

Feyre has returned to the Spring Court, determined to gather information on Tamlin's manoeuvrings and the invading king threatening to bring Prythian to its knees. But to do so she must play a deadly game of deceit – and one slip may spell doom not only for Feyre, but for her world as well.

As war bears down upon them all, Feyre must decide who to trust amongst the dazzling and lethal High Lords – and hunt for allies in unexpected places.

In this thrilling third book in the #1 New York Times bestselling series from Sarah J. Maas, the earth will be painted red as mighty armies grapple for power over the one thing that could destroy them all.


DON’T KILL ME, I’M SORRY! FAVORITE READS OF 2017Eliza and Her Monsters by Francesca Zappia
Published by Greenwillow Books on May 30th 2017
Genres: Contemporary, Young Adult
Pages: 385
Format: Hardcover
Source: Purchased

Her story is a phenomenon. Her life is a disaster.

In the real world, Eliza Mirk is shy, weird, and friendless. Online, she’s LadyConstellation, the anonymous creator of the wildly popular webcomic Monstrous Sea. Eliza can’t imagine enjoying the real world as much as she loves the online one, and she has no desire to try.

Then Wallace Warland, Monstrous Sea’s biggest fanfiction writer, transfers to her school. Wallace thinks Eliza is just another fan, and as he draws her out of her shell, she begins to wonder if a life offline might be worthwhile.

But when Eliza’s secret is accidentally shared with the world, everything she’s built—her story, her relationship with Wallace, and even her sanity—begins to fall apart.